Candy and flowers? Cowards give candy and flowers.
At American Science and Surplus, located just outside Geneva's city limits, love means more than a cliché.
Here are some of the, um, more interesting gift ideas for the science guy or girl in your life.
You could give your honey a heart-shaped box of chocolate, of course, but how much more meaningful is AS&S's pulsating heart lamp or life-sized 29-piece human heart anatomical model? You could write her name inside and watch her swoon.
On fire with devotion? Try a box of a dozen hunks of burnin’ love, 12 heart-shaped red and white candles. Or best of all, make your own hearts with little ceramic heart molds. Nothing says “I love you,” after all, like a plate of chopped liver hearts.
She’s expecting jewels? You’ve come to the right place. Browse among a selection of giant, 3-inch diamonds or sapphires or a box of assorted stretchy rubber gems, or the special, eight for $5.95, magnetic gems, perfect for iron maidens or steel magnolias. If she’s picky, get her the assortment of 36 polished gemstones displayed on a board and let her pick her own—or the shrinky-dink jewelry kit and tell her to bake her own damn bracelet.
Don’t have a girlfriend? Try the silver-bead necklaces, half a buck for three 16-inch strands, which means you can buy enough to give to every woman you see all day long.
Want to get sappy? Give her a box of 80 blue teddy bear eyes for 75 cents with a note that says “I only have eyes for you.” (Try not to think about the 40 blind bears out there.)
She’s not that sappy? Try the AS&S full-sized bull whip.
Lingerie? Yes, of course, especially for him. You can pick from the XXXXS squirrel underpants (these are really tighty whities) or the Dutch Army surplus olive-drab fleece pants liners.
If, on the other hand, you need to end a relationship, go with the whoopee cushion to surprise her with, or, for him, try leaving our stuffed horse’s head in bed with him when you sneak off in the morning. Guys love movie references!
More at www.sciplus.com.
- Geneva Store Location: Route 38, a quarter-mile east of Kirk Road
- Phone number: 630-232-2882
- Store Hours: 9am -9pm during the holidays
- Website shopping: www.sciplus.com
(The first 3 letters of Science, the last 4 letters of Surplus!)
- Founded: About 1937, give or take
- Payments accepted: MasterCard, Discover, Visa, Cash, Debit Card, checks
- Products: Toys, kits and models; office, household and craft supplies; science and laboratory supplies; militaria; motors; tools; pieces and parts of electronics, robotics, hardware, wiring and more!
- Services: Gift certificates
- Return policy: 30 days
Editor's note: Text and photos courtesy of American Science & Surplus. This story is from 2011, so there will be other gifts available in 2012.