No, There Was No Bomb in the Potato Salad

Josef’s potato salad as a terrorist threat?

That was the situation. 

It was Mothers’ Day, 2011. I knew what my mom would really enjoy in addition to a hanging basket: Josef’s potato salad, from Josef’s Elegante Meats and Deli, http://patch.com/A-h0VJ, Suite A, in Geneva. Ever since the first time I tried the potato salad, way too many calories ago, I had declared it as good as my mother’s. Maybe (Mom don’t kill me for saying this), even better. Just a little! But ... really top-notch potato salad.

So since that dreadful day when I first sampled Josef’s (dreadful in that it’s impacted my waistline and my wallet, to the detriment of both) potato salad, I’ve been a major fan. I made sure to have it for dinner one night when my mom would be there. She fell under its spell, as well. 

My mother LOVES the potato salad. So it was a perfect gift. 

Until the moment I remembered, as we relaxed on our deck prior to the actual Moms’ Day feast, that my mom was leaving town the day after Mothers’ Day, to visit a friend in California.

No matter, she said. She’d simply take it with her to eat on the plane. 

Well, great, except I’d splurged and got her two pounds of the stuff. Pack it in an insulated bag, I suggested. You and friend Jane can eat it during the week.

It was a great plan, until she got to the airport. Until the Homeland Security folks decided there was something suspicious about potato salad in a carry-on insulated bag.

“What is this?” demanded the security person.

“Potato salad,” my mother answered.

Did you tell him it was Josef’s potato salad? I inquired that evening. If you’d offered him some, he would have realized it was not a bomb, but da bomb, in terms of potato salad.

“Do I look like a person who would smuggle a bomb onto a plane in potato salad?” asked my irate, nearly 85-year-old mother.

The basic response was along the lines of, “You look like the kind of person who other people would snooker into smuggling a bomb onto a plan in potato salad.” 

For some very tense moments, she wondered if she’d make her plane, let along get to keep her treat. In the end, she was allowed to board, with her two pounds of Josef’s potato salad, with minutes to spare. I don’t believe she gave any to the poor security officer. I feel he deserve a few containers of the stuff, as recompense for his trying to determine whether my mom was trying to blow up an airplane with fabulous potato salad.

Moral of the story? There isn’t one, except to say (and no, I receive no kickbacks!) to try Josef’s potato salad. My kids fight over it. And it was a wonderful gift, that was feared to be an explosive over heartland America.

Instead, it flew to California, where people 2,000 miles away enjoyed it thoroughly.

Oprah: You should have made it one of your favorite things!